Meeting/visiting etiquettes

BismilLahhirRahmannirRaheem

Meeting and visiting each other is customary in our social life. One may visit a friend, a brother, a co-worker, a relative, or an acquaintance on purpose, or just for its own sake. Since Islam is a comprehensive code, it provides guidance for all aspects of life.
Today’s Khutba throws some light on the etiquettes of visiting or meeting each other.

In Islamic social order, visiting and meeting friends is a virtuous act, which deserves a reward. A tradition of Prophet (SAW) related in Tirmizi is that one, who visits a sick person, or meets a brother, will be addressed by angels as: “You are good, your visit is good, and you have made a house for yourself in Paradise.”

Islam has prescribed the following etiquettes for meeting and visiting:

1. Your face should reflect pleasure, warmth and happiness. That is why Prophet (SAW) as per Tirmizi said that a smile for a friend is a “Sadaqah”. What is said first should be a message of love, peace and safety, which Shariah has phrased as “Assalaam-u-Alaikum wa Rehmatullahi wa Barakatuhu.” Irrespective of age, visit or meeting should start with this greeting. The reward is more for the one who says it first.

All nations have their own greetings to express love and pleasure. Arabs used to greet each other with “Un Amallaahu Bika A’eena” meaning “May Allah keep your eyes cool”, and “Un Amallaahu Bika Sabaahan”, meaning “May Allah make your morning pleasant.” In Iranian custom, it was “Hazaar saal bazi”, meaning, “May you live a thousand years”. It is “good morning, good evening, and good night” in the West. Islam has designed a unique and best greeting “Assalaam-u-Alaikum”. It has many reasons, some are:

A. This has been the unanimous practice of all the Prophets. Qur’an mentions “Wassalamu Ala’iyaa”, uttered by them, or “Wassalaamun Alal Mursaleen” said about them.

B. Its nature is that of “Zikr”, or Du’aa. Islam’s Salaam is not limited to time or place; it has the secret of eternal peace.

C. Concealed in it is the religious glory and grandeur, because the real and eternal peace is that which is given by Allah (SWT) alone.

D. The best wish you could have for a person, and the best “Du’aa” you can give him, and the best thing he would love to have for him is peace, safety and security. Peace and safety for his life and wealth, for his family and children, and for this world and the Aakhira. See, how every possible aspect of life is covered in Islamic greetings.



E. When the two individuals meet, there is always some uncertainly, some indifference, and there may be a lurking suspicion for being strangers. “Salaam” clears the fog of suspicion, indifference and estrangement. One warm expression of Salaam brings them together in love and peace, and both wish peace and safety for each other. How lovely, and how great our Salaam is!


F. Islam has defined Salaam as a symbol of recognition among its followers. Muslims may be from different countries, different cultural backgrounds, may have different political nationalities, and may speak different languages, but as soon as they say “As Salaam-u-Alaikum”, all barriers are gone, and all gaps are bridged. The charm of Salaam fills their hearts with warmth and hospitality and it unites them in a bond of brotherly love and affection.


G. When Prophet (SAW) migrated to Madinah Munawwarah, the first lesson he taught was about Salaam. He said, “O people, make Salaam a custom among your self and spread it, invite each other to have food with you, and pray while others are asleep, (meaning prepare yourself for Tahajjud). Such practice will enable you to enter peacefully in Paradise.”

In yet another tradition quoted in Tirmizi, the purpose of Salaam has been told. Prophet (SAW) said, “You will not enter Paradise, until you embrace Faith, and you will not embrace Faith, until you don’t start loving each other, and I tell you a thing, which if you start practicing, you will start loving each other, and that is to adopt Salaam as a common custom among yourselves.”

There are many other gems about Salaam in other traditions of Prophet (SAW), which I will mention at some other occasion.

2. Another expression of fraternal love when you meet your brother is the handshake, the Musaafah. It fulfills the purpose of Salaam and that is why Islam considers Musaafah as a part of Salaam.

Prophet (SAW) said that Salaam’s concludes at Musaafah. The people of Yemen brought this gift of Musaafah to Madinatun Nabi, and Prophet (SAW) approved it and considered it as one of the means to foster brotherly love and unity. Musaafah was the practice of Prophet (SAW) himself. Hazrat Abu Zar (RA) said that whenever he met him Prophet (SAW), always made a handshake with him. It was also the custom among companions of the Prophet (SAW). As quoted in Tirmizi, Prophet (SAW) said that when two Muslim brothers meet, they should make handshake as their sins are forgiven before they part with each other. Another tradition quoted in Mishkaat relates that handshake cleans grudge and malice from the heart.




Following the greeting of Salaam, handshake is the beginning of the meeting as quoted in Mirqaat, volume 4, page 575. Also, quoted by Abu Dawood, praying for each other’s Maghfiraah by saying “Yaghfirullahu Lana walakum” is also the Sunnah of Prophet (SAW). Both hands should do Musaafaah. Hazrat Abdullah bin Masood (RA) has reported, “My hand was in between the hands of Prophet (SAW), which tells us the handshake style of Prophet (SAW).

Prophet (SAW) was also observed “embracing’ when he met his companions. Hazrat Abu Zar (RA) said that once Prophet (SAW) summoned him and he was not home. On his return, he learned and rushed to see the Prophet (SAW), who stood from his bed and embraced him. (Abu Dawood). When Hazrat Zaid bin Harisa (RA) reached Madina after the conquest of Kheybar, Prophet (SAW) was very pleased and he fondly hugged him and kissed him. (Tirmizi). That means that if you see a brother after a considerable gap of time, then you may hug him to express your happiness and love for him. May Allah enable us to follow these beautiful etiquettes of Islam in our daily life.